Loving a changed body

When you’re a mom all you think about is your child and his well being but all Tyler wants to do right now is cling to me. So the real question is “how much can one get done during nap time ?” - well, there's me setting new world records daily, zooming around on an allocated time frame. 

Then when the day is over I feel like a zombie, with no life left in me. However last night Brandon encouraged me to start a home workout routine and I’m really paying the price for it today, but so glad he gave me the boost that I so badly needed. Since lockdown I haven’t done any form of exercise, I really thought running after a toddler was a new version of exercise, well apparently I was wrong.

For those that don’t know me well, I am insulin resistant (borderline diabetic) and I have an enlarged fatty liver (NAFLD). By doctors orders I have to lose weight, cut out carbs and sugar and of course exercise every day. 

I've literally made all the excuses in the book -  I’m too tired, I work, I’m exhausted running after my toddler, I need to prepare food, I have washing, cleaning or tidying to do, I’m trying to catch up on my favorite Netflix documentary or series and the list goes on and on. However being IR I’m fatigued all day long and seldom get the drive to do anything. So I guess being a procrastinator is something I'm good at even when I'm not trying to be.

Since giving birth I’ve hated the way my body looks - my flabby tummy, forever changed breasts and last but not least those good ol' stretch marks. 

I have come a long way since then and lost a lot of weight which is encouraging to say the least BUT I’m no where closer to my goal weight or BMI as my doc calls it. 

What I’ve learned about this new body of mine is that it not only created a miracle but carried my little boy, my perfect angel. It kept him safe and nurtured him for 9 months and many months after that. Accepting that my body has changed forever was probably the hardest thing I've had to do.

If only I thanked my body more instead of criticizing it 

If only I loved my body more instead of hating it

If only I were more proud of my body instead of hiding it

If only I nurtured my body more instead of neglecting it

If only I listened to my body instead of ignoring it 

Loving your body isn't just about saying you do, it's about you feeling like no one can hurt you with words about their version of how you look.

Love the skin you're in, it's the only one you will ever have.